Wednesday, April 13, 2016

You need a death certificate for that? Really?!?

I donate blood regularly. I have for many years, but I especially understand the importance after the many, many, many times my Vern needed transfusions to stay alive. So I headed off to Sunset Station this morning for my scheduled appointment and was in and out within the hour.

They were giving a free breakfast or lunch buffet coupon if you donated, so I took my voucher over to the Rewards Center to get the actual coupon to use sometime this month. Easy, right?  You would think.

I handed the voucher to the nice gentleman along with my driver's license and mentioned that I didn't have my reward card with me. He said that wasn't a problem and proceeded to pull my info up on the computer. He verified my birth date and printed out a new card and handed it to me, along with the buffet coupon.  The name on the card was Vern West.  Ummm ... "That's my husband." ... "Oh, your card is printing out now."  "He died."  "Oh dear, I am sorry."  "It's been 5 years."  "That's ok, just bring in his death certificate and we can remove him from your account."

What????  Are you kidding me???  For a casino reward card?  Ack!!!! There aren't even any points on the card.  (No - I didn't say any of that out loud. My experience this past weekend with the delayed/cancelled flights and seeing how badly others behaved is still fresh in my memory, so I'm practicing kindness these days.)

So Vern will be staying on my Sunset Station rewards account. He's still on the Verizon cell phone and DirecTV accounts and our gas and electric utility bills. They're all paperless and paid automatically from my checking account, so seeing his name on monthly bills isn't an issue. And it's not because I'm procrastinating about doing this (I do have a rather long list of THOSE things). It's because having to pull out that stinkin' death certificate is hard. Even at 5 years. Trust me, I know he's dead. I'm living with that. Every day.  But I can choose to not have to handle that piece of paper that authenticates the death of my forever love just to have his name removed from an account. It's a choice I can make quite easily, thank you.

And in case you didn't know, my young widowed friends are required to carry their spouse's death certificate with them whenever they travel out of the country with their children. That just makes no sense at all. It should be noted on their passports so that awful document isn't needed.

I also received a t-shirt for my blood donation today.  If you're able, I hope you'll consider being a regular blood donor. It's so important to have a blood supply available for those who need it. Trust me ... I know that, too.


Anonymous said...

I can't donate blood because I don't weigh enough and also because I have psoriasis which is an autoimmune disease. Which to me sometimes totally sucks. I hate needles but would do it once in awhile if I could.

Susie Hemingway said...

These strange rules are all rather distressing deep down and still catch you unawares don't they. I still get upset when I see junk mail or emails with Hamada and Susie headings as I did the other day. You would think after five years the sadness you feel would dissipate but it doesn't. Just a little thing like your experience brings back these feelings of loss. I would love to give blood but here in the UK you cannot if you take any regular medications as I do for under active thyroid and BP tablets. Still I have close family members that give regularly in honour of Hamada, now that does feel good. Love to you Dianne and keep up the amazing work you do for others, you are truly a star. xx